Tobi and Yasser – Nature and Elegance at Quail Lodge

Posted on September 2, 2015 by jlammerts

Tobi and Yasser were college sweethearts. They had met at UC Riverside early on – in their Freshman/Junior year, respectively – and became inseparable very soon. Despite their very different family backgrounds – Tobi is from a Korean-American family and Yasser from a Persian-American family – they found so much in common that there was never even a doubt that they would stay together. They were both family people, both love nature and animals. And wherever they were not already sharing the same interests and hobbies, chances were they would very soon! Yasser had always been big on playing sports, and soon enough Tobi picked up exercising as well – she would even begin her wedding day with a run! But more of that later…

One of the things they always shared was a love for the outdoors. Hiking, camping in Big Sur, and an engagement in the rain forest in Costa Rica – that way it was pretty clear that their wedding celebration would at least partly take place in beautiful nature. However, for that special day Tobi did not want “rustic” but “classy and elegant.” The solution? Quail Lodge in Carmel.

Set in the softly rolling hills of Carmel Valley as far as you can see, Quail Lodge has it all: a gorgeous outdoor ceremony site, elegant event space at the Clubhouse, and cozy accommodations at the Lodge. I knew it well, and I was overjoyed when Tobi and Yasser chose my company, A Day Like No Other, to plan, design and coordinate their Great Day.

For Tobi, wedding day began (AFTER her morning run!) with a hair and makeup session…

… in the bridal suite at Quail Lodge …

under the expert hands of Anna and Soyeoon from Wowpretty Salon. Next step (literally!) – get into her elaborate strapless Maggie Sottero wedding dress, with exquisite lace detailing and crystal embellishment…

Tobi’s bridesmaids, all in midnight blue crepe dresses, had quite some work to do lacing the bride up! Then: jewelry!

… crystal-embellished bridal shoes…

… and her bridal bouquet (from Janelle Jacky of Green Petal Designs, who created all the gorgeous floral decor throughout)

– and ready for First Look on the picturesque bridge at Quail Lodge!

While the couple had many, many photos and video footage taken (by Patrick Ang‘s photo and video crews), we were all busy getting the ceremony site at Quail Meadows set up for an outdoor Catholic Mass officiated by Tobi’s uncle.

A radiant and expectant bride was waiting upstairs in the “barn” (a rustic-elegant building at Quail Meadows)…

… until the great moment had come. The bride was preceded by her cute flower girl…

… and then her proud Dad escorted her all the way to the ceremony:

Isn’t that romantic? Her processional song, played by DJ John Gregoria of DNA Entertainment (who provided music throughout), was the Jurassic Park theme melody, and throughout the wedding mass, friends and relatives provided live music as well.

Cocktail Hour for the more than 170 guests was held on the patio of the Quail Clubhouse…

… with baby photos of the couple and other family photos for the guests to reminisce about, and with a photo booth (also from DNA Entertainment) which was a huge hit.

Guests looked up their seating assignment for dinner on an elaborate chalkboard chart by Ryanne Steele of Steele My Heart …

… and were then treated to a wonderful Persian wedding ceremony. Lili Ghazian of Aroosi had created an elegant sofreh-aghd (wedding spread) in the golden and blush pink colors of the wedding:

… and officiant Niloufar Nouri brought it all to life, walking the couple and the audience through the time-honored traditional ceremony step by step, explaining the symbolic meaning of all elements.

For example, the mothers rub sugar above their children’s heads to shower their marriage with sweetness.

The couple exchanged vows and rings once more…

It was very moving!

After that, everyone was ready for dinner…

…with tables set in midnight blue shimmering linens, ivory napkins and lots and lots of candle light in mercury glass and rose gold-colored votives…

The couple was presiding over it all from their sweetheart table…

Following dinner, bride and groom were planning to cut their cake from Patisserie Parker-Lusseau, but that’s not that easy for a Persian groom! First he had to negotiate for the cake knife with a succession of dancing ladies who were teasing him with a traditional knife dance…

during which he had to pay them off several times until he could finally snatch the knife from them!

Guests had the choice of dessert – wedding cake or mini red velvet Bundt cakes from Nothing Bundt Cakes with ice cream. And then everyone couldn’t wait to get up and start dancing!

Persian and American hits took turns and got the crowd going… and after a stop at the late-night snack bar, everyone was tired and happy, but nobody really wanted to go home. Everyone had such a good time!

And here is a little live preview of their wedding video:

tobi + yasser from Patrick Ang on Vimeo.

Many happy years together, Tobi and Yasser!

A French Princess at the Julia Morgan Ballroom

Posted on August 16, 2015 by jlammerts

All the brides for whom my company, A Day Like No Other, is planning a wedding, are a princess for the day. But none of my brides had so far taken this idea so verbatim – until Tanya requested a “French Princess” theme for her wedding! So together we set out to find the perfect “castle” for her and her Prince Charming (aka Dan) to celebrate with their 200 or more guests.

Tanya and Dan

We found our castle in the storied Merchants’ Exchange Building in San Francisco’s Financial District: the elegant Julia Morgan Ballroom. The bride chose coral and lavender for her wedding colors, plus a lot of sparkle and candlelight. So we began designing to make this vision come true. A full 15 months later, the Great Day had finally come.

Tanya got ready in the nearby Omni Hotel under the expert hands of hair and makeup artist Sunshine from Wowpretty Salon.

The princess wore a gorgeous wedding dress with a shirred bodice, crystal-encrusted belt and full skirt with layers and layers of tulle and a train:

… and she carried a romantic bouquet in ivory, coral and lavender tones by Deidre Rastelli of Tutti Fiori…

The First Look took place on the dramatic sweeping staircase in the lobby of the Omni Hotel…

…. followed by more photos:

And then it was time for Church! The couple had their ceremony at Old St. Mary’s Church just a block up from the hotel…

… and here comes the bride!

Meanwhile, the Day Like No Other team (my assistants Angeliki and Quan and myself) spread out – Church, photo session, reception venue – to get all the family photos done and everything ready in time for the arrival of the guests at the Julia Morgan Ballroom.

First off: photo galleries of the couple…

and then – escort cards, custom-designed, custom-made and hand-calligraphed on silver and lavender card stock, outfitted with an organza bow, and each of them sitting atop a wedding favor box (bottle stoppers with a heart motif) – one of my bigger projects, but certainly very princess-like!

For the dining room design, we chose lavender uplighting and lavender napkin bands with crystal-encrusted buckles (my second-biggest production here…), and together with the centerpieces from Tutti Fiori and lots of mirrors and candle light, it all came together to one unified design scheme:

“Prince” and “Princess” had their own sweetheart table…

During dinner (and throughout the evening), guests were entertained by Woody Miraglia and Andrew Tran from Big Fun DJs, and as dusk fell, Monique Albert’s beautiful lavender uplights (from Just De’Lights) imparted a beautiful ambiance on the grand ballroom.

Throughout the evening, guests were also having fun with a DIY photo booth and – the great hit of the day – with having their portraits done by caricature artist Michael Rosenthal of Caricatures 4 Every Event …

… while the little guests had fun in the game room with babysitter Claire Schimaneck.

What else? Cake cutting, of course! And with Dan being a physician and Tanya a nurse, they cut the cake with scalpels, to the amusement of all their guests… it actually works! Underneath the beautiful modern cake design by Jasmine Rae Cakes a rich chocolate-and-raspberry cake as well as a creamy vanilla cake were waiting…

Then came the bouquet toss and the garter toss – oops, no! No garter… a stethoscope toss! (More merriment from the guests!)

Following the cake dessert, the couple enjoyed their First Dance to the tune of “Lucky:”

And then bride, groom and their attendants treated their guests to a special performance “Gangnam style:”

That set off a truly wild dance party for everyone…

… and last but not least, at the end of the night the guests sent Tanya and Dan off to their married bliss with a sparkler farewell; a glorious fireworks worthy of any princely couple!

Every single moment was captured by photographer Lisha Wang (just wait until you see HER photos!) and videographer Gusto Lopez of The Life In Digital – for lasting memories of a truly unforgettable day.

Many happy years together, Tanya and Dan!

Asian Elegance: Elaine and Danny at Hakone Gardens

Posted on August 10, 2015 by jlammerts

Elaine and Danny met in College. And then they took their time… more than a decade, actually! When they finally took “the plunge,” they wanted to make it a very special celebration. And for that they found a gem of a wedding venue literally in their backyard. A mere twenty minutes away from their home, there is a magical century-old park – Hakone Gardens, one of the oldest Japanese Gardens in the Western Hemisphere, 18 acres of magnificent Japanese horticulture and historic architecture. I feel so honored that they chose my company, A Day Like No Other, to help them plan and design their beautiful celebration.

A heavy wooden gate opens to reveal all that beauty…

which is open for private events like this elegant garden wedding.

After having her hair and makeup expertly done by Tiffany Chiang of Design Her Image, the bride got into her crystal-encrusted wedding dress…

… and for her own romantic bouquet as well as the braidesmaids’ bouquet, she had turned to Ingela Floral Design:

At “First Look,” she moved her husband-to-be to tears! Here they are:

While Elaine and Danny were having their pre-ceremony photos taken by Ano and Hagop of Hagop’s Photography (wait until you see THEIR photos!!), guests were greeted at the traditional welcome table…

… and then seated for the ceremony with classical guitarist Julio Reyes providing a beautiful musical background.

Officiant Carolyn Selic of Mixed Blessings is awaiting the couple… and here comes the Bride!

Just married!

While guests were exploring the beautiful gardens, enjoying Champagne and nibbling delicious little bites from Eisenhauer Catering, and while the couple had even more photos taken…

… my assistant Quan and I were super busy getting everything set up and ready for the reception on the “Madrone Mound,” surrounded by mature trees and bamboo hedges and by the authentic Japanese buildings on site (all exact replicas of historic architecture):

Centerpieces in peach tones by A Day Like No Other and an escort card set-up…

… and a cake by Euro Delights Bakery:

The newlyweds got their own special table, of course:

In lieu of a dance floor, bride and groom had requested a children’s play area right in the middle of the dinner tables, and surprise performances by the bride’s sister and brother-in-law and a funny slide show made the celebration very personal.

As dusk fell, the overhead string lights by Bay Area Event Lights gave the scene a magical glow…

… and at the end of the evening, guests lined up with myriads of glow sticks to send the newlyweds off to their married bliss.

Many happy years together, Elaine and Danny, and our best wishes on your way!

Timeless Elegance in San Francisco – Liz’ and Tom’s Dream Wedding

Posted on June 14, 2015 by jlammerts

After a full eight years of courtship, Liz and Tom were ready to tie the knot – together with their extended families and many, many friends from all over the country. That made for a big wedding celebration – a guest list of 180, no less… and both Bride and Groom felt strongly that this celebration should mark the occasion in high style. Timeless elegance, no frills – those were my “marching orders” when the couple, together with the Mother of the Bride, enlisted my company, “A Day Like No Other” to help plan and design their wedding.

A few elements were already in place: the ceremony would be held at historic St. Patrick’s Church in downtown San Francisco – one of the oldest churches in town, and a very beautiful one at that. A reception would follow at the equally storied City Club of San Francisco, housed in a former Stock Exchange building, with an Art Deco interior, gold-leaf ceilings and murals by none less than Diego Rivera. It doesn’t get much more elegant than that!

The bride and her bridesmaids would get ready at the Bridal Suite in the nearby Marriott Marquis Hotel, actually next door to the church, with absolutely stunning views of the City and the San Francisco Bay:

Make-up artist Jessica Morton of Miabel Artistry and her assistant took care of the Bride:

while gowns were steamed and finishing touches applied…

The bride wore a couture gown by designer Trish Lee, and for the bridesmaids’ dresses, we had come up with midnight blue as the color of choice (the lighter blue dress is the stylish dress of the Mother of the Bride) as an attractive backdrop to bouquets in ivory and blush pink by Melissa Comito-Aakre of A Simple Ceremony:

The Bride would be all ivory, from her stunning lace dress …

to her princess heels …

And here she is, with the City at her feet! (And with photographer Elisabeth Millay capturing all those precious moments throughout the day).

Finally, the great moment had come to walk over to Church with her bridesmaids –

unseen by the Groom whom my trusted Senior Assistant Angeliki Menig had already whisked away together with his groomsmen.

The service at St. Patrick’s was truly moving and very personal, with readings by relatives – and even the cantor was a dear friend of the couple, soprano Liz Goedecke, whose beautiful voice soared and filled the nave.

Just married!

And here is our radiant, oh-so-happy, beautiful bride:

Aren’t they a stunning couple?

Time for the “Day Like No Other” team (enforced by trainee Quan Wu) to rush to the City Club, while Liz and Tom were already there on the rooftop for more photos – the view is just incredible up there!

We three hurried to get everything prepared for the reception, together with the incredible City Club crew. Tables were set with ivory linens from Napa Valley Linens, centerpieces by A Simple Ceremony and favors (quintessential San Francisco chocolates – Ghirardelli! – in embellished organza bags) handmade by the couple. Napkins were midnight blue like the bridesmaids’ dresses and favor bags and embellished with a profusion of (faux…) pearls.

Tables were not only numbered, but also named for the many places meaningful to the couple, from Denver to Dubrovnik… so many personal touches!

Bride and Groom presided over an enormous Head Table but barely took the time to grab a bite themselves – so many friends and relatives to greet!

And there were gorgeous flowers and candlelight everywhere:

What else? Fabulous food and drink (of course!)

and music – a lot of it! Tom, the Groom, had booked the KJ Allstars, a 7-piece band who kept the party going…

… and who accompanied the newlyweds’ First Dance.

And with that the dance floor was officially opened. Guests barely took a little break to watch the cutting of the gorgeous signature Wedding Cake (from Chef Bala of The Cakemaker), clad in ivory folds of the same pattern as the linens (!)

and of the Groom’s Cake (from SusieCakes) showing the logo of Northwestern University where the couple first met eight years ago.

And yes, of course, for watching the bouquet toss! The Night Owl Photo Booth was a huge hit – as was the stylish Cigar Lounge. And even more dancing to follow – until it was time to say goodbye and send the radiant couple on their way. Guests lined up by the front door and waved hundreds of sparklers, as Liz and Tom boarded a breathtaking silver 1947 Rolls Royce limousine by a private collector.

Our best wishes on your way, and many happy years together!

Whirlwind Planning for a Beautiful Wedding: Catherine and Jithun

Posted on April 18, 2015 by jlammerts

Last December, Catherine and Jithun enlisted my company, A Day Like No Other, to help them plan their wedding in August of this year, complete with traditional elements from Jithun’s native India – a Sangeet (dance party) a day before, for example… and of course a big Western style wedding. The even bigger Indian wedding would then follow shortly after, organized and hosted by the groom’s family in India. We were already right in the middle of all this planning … when the unexpected happened. A serious illness in the family forced Catherine and Jithun to move their wedding date up: to the following Sunday! Suddenly, we did not have another four months for planning, but a mere four DAYS.

Definitely a challenge! And definitely time to call in favors within my network of fantastic vendors – many of whom have become my friends over the years. I started making phone calls, and what happened was nothing short of a little miracle- everyone was immediately on board, and everyone agreed: we will make sure that these two wonderful young people will get more than an “emergency affair.” No, we would give them a joyful, memorable wedding celebration with all the bells and whistles we’d be able to muster!

First order of the day: find a new venue! On our first day of emergency planning, I received three offers, and Catherine chose the elegant Casa Madrona Hotel in Sausalito …

… just across the Golden Gate Bridge …

… and overlooking the San Francisco Bay and the Sausalito Yacht Harbor:

Catering would be provided by Poggio Trattoria next door – they cater all of Casa Madrona’s special events, and their food is simply stellar.

Catherine’s childhood Rabbi made himself available for an evening wedding ceremony, and florist Deidre Rastelli of Tutti Fiori provided a beautiful antique chuppah which she decorated over and over with the flowers of the bride’s choice.

And of course she made a bridal bouquet exactly as Catherine had envisioned it, in a saturated maroon color (her second accent color, together with an aquamarine blue). And boutonnieres. And bridesmaids’ bouquets. And centerpieces. Everything!

Jira of Wowpretty Salon sent two senior stylists…

and a wedding dress (the original one won’t get ready until May…) and pretty sandals were rush-ordered; the bride would wear her own stunning aquamarine jewelry… here we go! Catherine, more beautiful and radiant than ever…

And what a dapper groom she has!

My assistant Kelsey jumped in at the last minute and accompanied bride and groom and their families and guests throughout the day, from setup and hair/makeup session to ceremony, dinner and dancing – and provided our first photos of the day, until we get all the “real” ones from our photographer, Shhivika Chauhan. (We got a few from her already as a little preview – you see how fantastic they are!). Shhivika was already booked by another couple until early afternoon of that same day, but for her there was no question whatsoever: she headed over directly from her morning job to shoot Catherine’s wedding!

The Casa Madrona staff under the guidance of catering manager Stacey Turner did a beautiful job setting up the ceremony with a view of the yacht harbor, with the chuppah outside and the guest seating sheltered, inside.

Cellist Suellen Primost gathered her Espiritu Ensemble for elegant ceremony music, and then the great moment had come…

Thomas Hughes Films live-streamed the ceremony for all those who hadn’t been able to attend at such short notice (and of course, they covered the festivities following the ceremony as well…)

Just married!

Aren’t they a handsome couple?!

Cocktails were served on the adjacent patio, with guests watching the golden light of the sunset.

Meanwhile, my assistant Kelsey, catering manager Stacey and her team set up the dining room…

complete with Catherine’s dream cake by Cake Coquette and favor boxes with French macarons from Chantal Guillon, all in her favorite wedding colors!

DJ Paul Burchfield of BigFunDJs got his equipment ready first for soft background music during dinner and then exuberant dance music, ranging from Frank Sinatra to Bollywood hits (yes!) and, of course, the Hora Dance:

It was a magical night…

Thank you to all who made it possible, and congratulations and many happy years together to Catherine and Jithun!

Fanfare Wedding Faire at Kohl Mansion: One-stop Shopping for the Elegant Bride!

Posted on February 3, 2015 by jlammerts

Never heard of Fanfare Weddings? No? Then it’s about time!

Fanfare Weddings is a group of luxury wedding vendors in the Greater San Francisco Bay Area whose specialties cover everything a couple might ever need for their wedding celebration – one high-end business of each category (me being the wedding planner/designer). And for more than two decades, this group has hosted its own elegant, well-curated wedding fairs twice a year, mostly at the historic Kohl Mansion in Burlingame.

The Winter Show 2015 took place on January 29 – and it was the best-attended winter show ever. Nearly a hundred brides, grooms, future bridesmaids and proud parents came to sip champagne, find elegant vendors for their upcoming wedding, win prizes and enjoy performances. It was more an elegant soiree than a classic wedding fair and everyone literally wore a big smile along with a goodie bag packed with glossy magazines and little favors.

Right at the entrance, they were greeted by a shiny white Maserati courtesy of Club Sportiva – the ultimate getaway car for the newlyweds!

And they were invited inside in style by Gabriel’s Trumpets Trio (Brassworks) – a truly regal sound.

Step into the grand mansion, and find gorgeous flowers by Plan Decor (and many more breathtaking arrangements to come – you’ll see!)…

Right in the first room, I was waiting at my booth with armfuls of roses for those brides …

… and photo books of my many weddings for inspiration.

I was flanked by Jessica Morton of Miabel Hair and Makeup Artistry and by Aria Bella, a classical trio of harp (Anna Maria Mendieta), Violin (Joyce Lee) and soprano (Gloria Mendieta Gazave).

Then there was a display of breathtaking wedding dresses by my friends Saida and Chantal from Nouvelle Vogue Bridal Salon:

Guests admired the beautiful light effects by Enhanced Lighting and got to enjoy yummy food by La Bocca Fina…

… accompanied by wine and champagne by Mills Wine Group, with dessert (cake bites) from Have Your Cake:

… the exact same delicious cake that’s hiding under these gorgeous wedding cake confections:

Bill Choy of Travelin’ Joe served the most delicious coffee varieties to go with these cakes, and guests then proceeded to meet officiant Minister Maggie and the team from the nearby Westin SFO hotel, and to swoon over classic invitations by Hyegraph …

… and a beautiful dining table designed by Classic Party Rentals …

… with flowers from Plan Decor:

Then it was time for the vendor presentation in the mansion’s soaring double-height Great Room – with Woody Miraglia of BigFunDJs as our MC – but not just some presentation!

There were musical performances by Gabriel’s Trumpets and Aria Bella Trio, there was a mini dance lesson by choreographer and dance instructor Cynthia Glinka of Dance with Glinka (get ready for your First Dance, brides and grooms!) …

… Plan Decor raffled away a dreamy white bridal bouquet…

…and Have Your Cake gave away a cake… and, yes, the Westin gave away a weekend stay for two! Of course we also have a world-class videographer (Thomas Hughes) and photographer (Teresa Halton) to round it all off – as I said, one-stop shopping for the luxurious bride… and now we’ll all go to work planning these elegant weddings, and that’s the most fun work ever!

Jeff and Adam, inseparable

Posted on January 24, 2015 by jlammerts

Partners in life and partners in business, there was not a hint of a doubt for Jeff and Adam that they belong together – and so getting married was just the logical next step. Easy? Well, yes – somehow. What the two found out pretty quickly is that there is a big difference between the idea and its actual execution… and that’s where my company, A Day Like No Other – Wedding Coordination and Design, comes in.

Jeff and Adam had pretty clear-cut ideas of how they wanted their wedding to look and to feel. Being the super busy businessmen that they are, the one thing most precious in their lives is – quality time, together, and together with their families. So they were envisioning a long wedding weekend with their families, in complete privacy and tranquillity, with fabulous food and wine. They found their dream venue at the far end of beautiful Carmel Valley – Mesa del Sol Vineyards, a private estate among rolling hills and verdant vineyards, with a beautifully restored luxury farmhouse big enough for their families, with a courtyard shaded by mature trees, a professional outdoor BBQ, a bocce ball court, a swimming pool… heaven!

Jeff and Adam had rented the property from Thursday to Monday, and they had already planned for a whole succession of family events … but with their busy schedules of (separate!) worldwide traveling there was simply no way they could do all the planning by themselves. And that’s how my team came to work with one of our favorite couples ever!

We helped Jeff and Adam finalize their plans from a welcome BBQ to wedding day to a send-off brunch, and the two even knew who would cook up a veritable storm for them and their guests: their personal friend, caterer Ben Lillywhite, who would move in with them and take over the state-of-the art kitchen to pamper their 45+ guests.

Speaking of guests… while Mesa del Sol is beautifully equipped, it’s not equipped for that many guests! From ceremony seating under a huge old olive tree (hay bales from a local feed store, hand-woven saddle blankets) to long farm tables for an outdoor dinner (Chic Party Rentals)…

… from lighting to music (DNA Entertainment) and beautiful floral decor (Natasha Kolenko) – not to forget a first-rate photographer (Sandra Fazzino) – there was a lot to plan and design in a mere 10 weeks!

Invitations were sent out… And then the Great Day had come!

Here the two are getting ready together…

…dapper and stylish as they both are!

They had requested a masculine version of the classic boutonniere, and that’s what they got…

Ready to go!

Last minute checkup on the vows…

… and then the moment had come!

Sheer happiness… I Do!

Time for a true farm-to-table dinner:

The kids were having fun, too…

… but definitely returned to the table when Ben’s incredible pies were served!

As dusk fell, the scene turned downright magical:

… and everyone around the table shared memories of the couple and funny stories!

Jeff, Adam and their guests truly enjoyed a day like no other… Many happy years together!

Your Personal Wedding Ceremony Planner – by A Day Like No Other!

Posted on November 20, 2014 by jlammerts

Congratulations – you are engaged! And you are beginning that whirlwind called “wedding planning.” Venues, caterers, florists, DJs… and then thousand other things. Believe it or not, the planning of the ceremony is rather a “second thought” for many couples. BUT… it’s at the core of the whole celebration – it’s the reason for the party! It’s the moment when you two are committing the rest of your lives to one another. So better focus on it right away!

And since it’s such an important moment in both your lives, the person sealing your bond, your officiant, should be someone you trust, cherish, admire, or have been a friend with for a long time.

The first and most important decision you have to make is whether you want a religious or non-religious ceremony. Both the Catholic and Protestant Church require the ceremony to take place in a house of worship; Jewish ceremonies may also take place outside a synagogue (at your reception venue, for instance). If you wish to get married in a Church of your faith, you will probably contact your parish or ask your parish priest to be your officiant at a different church; but in any case, you’ll follow the framework that applies within your religious community. You may choose one ceremony with a priest of each religion present, or two separate ceremonies (only one will then be legally binding by the signing of the marriage certificate). In many cases, premarital religious instruction is required, especially in the case of an interfaith marriage, and in some cases a Church ceremony even requires that the partner who is not member of this specific religious group needs to convert and become a member first, a process that can easily take up to a year. So better check this out, first thing!

Your other option is to have a civil ceremony – and here the options are nearly limitless. To clarify: “civil” does not mean “non-religious;” it only means “not recognized as binding by an established Church.” You can have a non-religious, simple courthouse ceremony, or you can have a spiritual ceremony, even a ceremony following the Catholic rite, just not inside a Catholic Church, without the strict regulations, and consequently not recognized by the Roman Catholic Church (the White-Robed Monks of St. Benedict, for example, are monks following Catholic beliefs who will perform a Catholic wedding mass for you, anywhere you choose… it will be a legally binding marriage, but not one recognized by the Roman Catholic Church). If you do not wish to be married by an ordained minister, even outside a house of worship, most judges or justices of the peace can officiate; and if you’d rather have a trusted friend or relative be your officiant, this person can become deputized for just this one day (at a very moderate cost, by the way). Or you may have observed an officiant at a wedding you attended and liked the way he or she conducted the ceremony – by all means, ask for referrals!

Sounds quite complicated, right? If you have a wedding planner (always recommended… after all, I am one myself!), he or she can help you find exactly the right solution AND the right person.

Once you have narrowed down your choices, I recommend that you meet each of the “possibles” with enough time to get a good impression of what this person is like and whether you feel well understood with your specific wishes and in your personal situation, and appreciated as persons. Ask about the way this person would conduct your ceremony or wedding mass, whether you can write your own vows, include rituals that are meaningful to you, readings by persons close to your heart; in short, find out what it would be like to be married by this person. Take your time; don’t rush it. No one can make that decision for you – this is intensely personal, and you’ll have to follow your heart here.

Your chosen officiant may recommend premarital counseling (many actually offer this service) – and you should seriously consider this option. I assume your first reaction will be – “WHY??” The two of you are deeply in love, committed to one another – what is there to counsel? Well, of course you are right… but the sad reality is that about half of all marriages in the US fail and end in divorce, and it is safe to assume that all these couples were equally deeply in love when they said their vows, and still… and because this is so and because you do not want this to happen to you, it’s a good idea to at least consider premarital counseling.

A bit of etiquette – depending on how close you are with your officiant, it would be a nice gesture to invite him or her to the Rehearsal Dinner and to the Reception. In many cases, officiants will politely excuse themselves due to “other commitments,” but it’s at least a nice gesture to offer it. And if they accept, they get a seat at one of the parents’ tables or other position for honored guests. If your officiant is a parish priest, a donation toward the Church is appropriate, and if he/she is not affiliated with a specific Church, you should show your appreciation with a personal gift.

With your officiant and ceremony venue in place – whatever you choose – it’s time to think about your vows. Of course you can always follow the standard “I Do’s” – nothing wrong with that – but if you’d rather express your own unique and personal feelings, you have to put these in words, and, believe me, that’s not easy! Take your time for that. A good starting point is to write a love letter to your partner; leave it in your drawer for at least 24 hours, and then read what you wrote. That will be the essence of what to say in your vows.

More details to think of: would you like to include readings in your ceremony? A favorite poem? Or maybe a favorite song or instrumental interlude? (And who would play or sing?) Would you like to include symbolic rites, like hand washing, ring warming, a sand ceremony, pouring wine ceremony, candle-lighting ceremony? There are so many ways to include your loved ones and even all of your guests and make them a real part of your ceremony and your union… just give it some thought!

And with that, I’ll let you go, because I know you’ll be super busy… and you’ll have a wonderful, meaningful, unforgettable wedding ceremony!

Trends in Wedding Bouquets – 2014 and Beyond

Posted on November 14, 2014 by jlammerts

A “trend” is defined as a direction – and mostly understood as “something new,” like in “Fashion Trend.” Looking back on the 2014 wedding season, and especially on the variety of beautiful and unexpected dress choices my brides had made, I was wondering about their flowers. Trends? Not really. When it came to their wedding flowers, my brides were surprisingly conservative! The undisputed winner of the year 2014 was the classic hand tied bouquet – mostly based on ivory and green, with accent colors. Very, very few exceptions… have a look for yourself.

Here’s the first textbook classic:

Angie’s ivory-and blush pink bouquet of roses and peonies to accompany her elegant summer wedding.

Here are more in a similar style:

Shaina had likewise chosen pink hues for her accent color, and her and her bridesmaids’ bouquets (see those below) were based on English roses and hydrangeas in ivory and various shades of pink.

Erica added fresh green accents with Bells of Ireland and green-tinged hydrangea…

Pam opted for peach (English roses, dahlias) for her rustic-nostalgic nuptials…

Lauren added a tina touch of blue to her otherwise elegantly simple and classic bouquet of ivory Vendela roses…

… and Laura chose hot pink as one of her accent colors, and her hand-tied bouquet consisted of stargazer lilies, roses and hydrangeas all in this color family.

Last but not least, one bride went for ultra-classical with a spherical all-red, all-rose bouquet with a glass handle and matching bridesmaids’ bouquets:

Which shows the versatility of this style! But still – wasn’t there a more adventurous style out there?

A little…

My “other” Laura went for a more relaxed, “wild” style for her outdoors vineyard wedding, with eucalyptus, succulents and berries mixed into the roses and lisianthus flowers. If any “trend” crystallizes here, it’s the succulents which have gained favor not only in table arrangements, but have made their way into the bridal bouquets, too.

Here’s another one:

Amy fell in love with a combination of succulents, eucalyptus, ranunculus and exotic protea blooms in saturated pinks for her nostalgic outdoor celebration.

Michele had variegated euonimus greenery added to her summery bouquet for her garden wedding, with sunny yellow as her accent color…

… and Vannie took it one step further: her bouquets were really “hand-tied” by herself, and with twine!

Only two couples did something totally unique. One, Alan, was actually a groom in a same-sex wedding who hand-crafted paper flowers:

… and the other one was bride Courtney’s handcrafted brooch bouquet:

What was NOT chosen? Well… no elegant straight bouquet of sculptural flowers (like calla lilies or long-stemmed roses); no cascading bouquets; and nothing “outrageous” like a flower lei in lieu of a bouquet.

Maybe you, dear readers, are up for that? Let me know your favorites!

Hooray, Erik and Shaina – we are on Ceremony Blog!

Posted on November 6, 2014 by jlammerts

Congratulations to our elegant couple Shaina and Erik! We all made it onto Ceremony Blog – check it out… it was a gorgeous, glamorous, big wedding. Sheer eye candy!

Wedding Woof

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Hooray, Erik and Shaina – we are on Ceremony Blog!